So here's the deal: our internet is awful. It's super slow and unpredictable and we've been told it's going to get better, but right now, that's so not the case. Long story short, when you don't have cable or satellite, this can sometimes make watching TV in a timely manner a bit of a struggle. There are some shows I watch on Netflix and some I watch through iTunes, like PLL, which I fell behind on again because none of my downloads were actually downloading. Anyway, I won't bore you with the details. I'm once again all caught up, and I have it set up so that new episodes will always download during non-peak hours, which will hopefully result in them arriving quickly and I can stay on top of things. With only three episodes of PLL to go, I'd ideally like to recap each and every one.

But that's moving forward. For now, we're stuck with another backlog to get through, and get through it, we shall--character breakdown style! Let's see what our little liars have been up to...

7.14 POWER PLAY
7.15 IN THE EYE ABIDES THE HEART
7.16 THE GLOVE THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE
7.17 DRIVING MISS CRAZY

Photo credit: Photo: Eric McCandless/Freeform — Photo credit: Photo: Eric McCandless/Freeform

ARIA

I almost can't even with this girl. Because I know she hasn't gone dark. I would actually LOVE it if she had. That would be the most thrilling thing Aria has done in ages, but alas, I'm pretty sure she's only being Dark!Aria long enough to get what she needs to keep Ezra out of prison (selfish) and to protect her friends, maybe (which doesn't make much sense since she's willing to terrorize her friends to protect them). I'd like to think the real motivation here is that Aria realizes if she doesn't play AD's game, AD will go after one of the other liars instead, and she prefers to be the one in control of the situation, or, and this seems unlikely considering Aria's skills, she has some super secret master plan to bring down AD and all that bad stuff she's been doing is just Aria's version of collateral damage. Honestly, I'm just glad we're not hearing the name Nicole as much these days, though I wish Aria'd pull Ezra into the mix. If only so he could stop stressing about dumb things like dance lessons. I'm fairly satisfied that at least Hot Caleb is involved with Liars' Lament now, but really, the liars are in peak form when they aren't lying to their SOs and are only lying to everyone else.

SPENCER

I considered doing Emily next, but no, I'm not ready to tackle that girl and her drama. So let's talk Spencer Hastings-Drake. Or Drake-Hastings. Whichever way you slice it, Spencer's dad is not a good person. But I don't want to focus on him. I've been loving Spencer's interactions with Hot Cop Marco, though anytime they stray from date to interrogation, I can't help but think, Spencer you're smarter than this. Don't reveal info to a cop without a lawyer present. I know there's a really good chance Spencer will somehow end up with Toby again before this season is over, but in my ideal world, she'll live to hook up with Hot Cop Marco another day, and then maybe if the finale features a time jump, it'll be all "Oh look, she's with Toby and she and Hot Cop Marco are co-parenting an adorable child together." It could happen. A few more notes about our dear Spencer: 1) As much as I didn't enjoy Spaleb, I'm glad they didn't just sweep it under the rug. I'm glad they're acknowledging it happened and that Spencer got the short end of Hot Caleb's stick. 2) This Mary Drake stuff. I dunno. I think it's supposed to be compelling, but I'm not really here for it. Is it wrong to wish she was so super crazy that she was causing mayhem all the time? Cause that I'd enjoy. If she's just a tragic figure, that's fine, but then I kinda hope she and Spencer manage to have some sort of relationship eventually. 3) I feel like Spencer is legit on the hook for quite a bit if stuff here, evidence or not. Is it possible the show might end with one of our liars behind bars, taking the fall for everyone?

EMILY & ALI

I thought about separating these two out, but their stories are so linked they kinda have to be together. Besides, I feel like I barely have anything to say about Emily. It's not like she isn't drowning in drama, but she lost some of my sympathy when she basically told Ali she wants her to have the baby. I know it's Emily's egg all sunny-side-up in there, but she gave up her rights to that egg when she donated it. This decision needed to be Ali's. I'm cool with Emily saying, "Hey, I think we could do this. I think we could be parents.", though newsflash, Emily, you shouldn't be in a position to take care of another human being, but I digress. For me, she took things a bit too far with her tone, impatience, and what felt like insistence. I know time is of the essence when deciding whether or not to have a baby, but something about it rubbed me the wrong way--something other than the general violations that took place for this baby to exist. All that aside, I really enjoyed Emily and Ali finally making it official-ish. And I enjoyed Emily and Mona at the doctor's office, posing as a fake couple, even more. Those two actually work really well together. Sadly, with so few episodes left, I have a feeling that's the end of the Emily and Mona show. As for Paige? I still hate Paige.

Photo credit: Eric McCandless/Freeform — Photo credit: Eric McCandless/Freeform

HANNA

Though I'm not much like Hanna, I always find I relate to her the most. I think it's the fact that she has herself convinced she's somewhat incapable, but when it comes down to it, she always does what needs to be done. And that's often my approach to problems too--I'm not sure if I can do this, but I'm not going to let that stop me from doing it. In that respect, Hanna is killing it. She's pissed at the Liars' Lament boardgame, super pissed at AD for hurting Hot Caleb, and she's not going to stand back and be a victim anymore. But she also doesn't know where to start. So she does what she can, and is loyal to her friends, another thing about her I can relate to and respect. She knows she owes Spencer and she does what she must to make it up to her. Plus, her scenes with Mona are always fun. Now, let's get to why we're really all here: HALEB IS ENGAGED! At least, I think. I mean, yeah, they are, but they did it in such an unconventional way that it's only 99% clear. But I kinda love that. And the whole scene in the tent, harkening back to their first night together, was perfect, paper cigar rings and all. It's easy to see Hanna as high-maintenance because of her love of fashion, etc, but deep down, exchanging paper rings in a tent in the woods IS Hanna. Hot Caleb has always brought out the best in her, and that's on full display in this scene. Her last engagement ring from what's-his-face was big and flashy (and so was he, really), but again, that's not really Hanna. Hot Caleb gets that. He gets her. Which is perfect. I'm super happy to see my OTP get engaged. They are #endgame for me, no matter what else happens on this show. HALEB always and foreva!

Also: “I would marry you right this second if we could find a bear that was licensed.”

Does it get more romantic than that? Probably, cause bears are scary, y'all. But still. Cute.

Lingering concerns:

Airport Spencer wasn't Spencer, you guys. I'm fully on team Spencer has a twin and that was totally her that Ezra ran into at the airport. Twencer is real and the Spencer Hanna encountered when she was kidnapped last season totally wasn't a dream--it was Twencer! Has it been Twencer at other times? Maybe, but I don't have time to rewatch everything...
Does anybody actually think Mona is AD? Cause no, she's not. I'll eat all of my hats if she is. Her secret liar lair is 100% about protecting the girls, cause Mona is a BAMF and they all need to recognize.
I used to find Lucas interesting. Now I'm just like, dude, move on with your life. This is sad times. You know Hanna is banging Hot Caleb in your condo, right? Find a Hanna replacement and move on.
Right now, my money is on Paige for AD. Reasons: I've never liked her, she's never liked Ali, and that disguised Aria face/vocie that has been directing Dark!Aria around town looks/sounds enough like Paige that I'm semi-convinced. On the other hand, that almost seems too easy. And I don't trust easy when it comes to PLL. So we'll see...